Every Silent Scream You Make

A Slight Tear In My Reflection

2010-05-17T21:59:00.004+08:00

We have certain times when we look into the mirror and we see ourselves, and yet at certain times we don't. We see a split image of what others want us to be. If we truly be ourselves, would the world except us for who really are and look on our strengths instead of our weakness and judge us fairly with our achievements and accomplishments instead of our faults and failures? Would other sacrifices worth more than some that have not been sacrificed? Would being anal about everything bring about a more pleasant outcome or result? Thoughts i wish i knew the answer for but i don't. I used to though... things change i guess?

Yeah and its great you know seeing you after so long, i mean you've changed( i've heard) for the better ( I hope). And still bright and cheerful and living life as colorful as it should be and i'm glad you do. Everything that happen was not exactly a total loss for me, I gained new insights and attained new knowledge and somehow learn that some things in life is unpredictable and if it just can't happen it can't, we just gotta let it happen when it does. And not just by saying it, and really allowing life to fit you in its plans. Everything is alright for me now, even though there are significant difference in our frequency, I do hope I am able to find a common ground to take it to a whole new level that can help my relationship grow. But what ever it is, I know, if the worst comes I am prepared with no hard feelings =)

P.S. You gotta stop speaking in korean, or i'm gonna sapit onto thy face.. MUAHAHAHAHAH!!!

Split in to many different parts

2010-05-06T14:38:00.002+08:00

I just love the way she hugs and kiss me and tell me that she loves me, its different though this time it seems to get better than before and everyday seems to pose a new challenge for me. I have waited for a very long time which seems like years even though its barely just months or a month before he flew back here. I mean, it could have taken her half a year or so to get here but who'd guessed it, plans from the man upstairs? Whichever it is, i'm just so glad she's here to be able to do things now together here and also get to do more things in days to come. I feel alive again, even besides the fact that i do not have my usual " intake" anymore. It is for the better and hopefully i can pull through, at least to control my urge. =) Love you so much sweetie!

A little more than one can take..

2010-03-24T18:59:00.001+08:00

Hey there again... It's been awhile. But during this period, life seems to have outdone itself. The wonders of life starts to appear again and i realize that, the longer you keep yourself on the path that has so far gotten you nowhere, the longer it takes for you to feel the bright side of life trying its very best to fulfill its role but cant penetrate the barricade you create for yourself. Sometimes we all have to stop and ask ourselves, could it be that everyone has a problem but myself? Or is it myself that is a problem costing everyone? The sooner we realize the spark or the cause, the sooner we are able to move on from there and search for more grace given. I always believe, " Learn to live and let live". Do not keep yourself tied to a rope so rough when you know you aren't a person of that material. I love my sweet " Bun" and really cant wait for her return =)

The Sweet Departure

2010-03-09T21:40:00.002+08:00

This post has no picture at the moment but it will be updated soon.

I hate this feeling when you have someone so caring , who brings the other side of life that you thought you could never see and makes you feel a thousand times better that the shitty feeling that you had before. Because at the end of the day, its gone, not by any mistakes or human error but by the work of nature. It's a soft and sweet departure and i do not know if that would stay as it is or the sweetness would return inevitably. I do hope that it does and I'll do my best to guide and nurture the path to be that way. Back at one again, feeling the emptiness and disappointment in life. Just down... still down.

My road leads me to an empty space with no greens and colors of the pasture, only clouds of fog and lines that defines the shapes of shadows drifting past me. It seems like a thousand miles of unending tedious travel to a place of solace and yet, I continue to do so. Always asked myself the reasons for persevering, Hope? Faith? or plain Stupidity? The drawing power seems overpowering and irresistible at times. I tried to fight it, embrace it but nothing works... The suspense is killing me.

Bam! Wham!

2010-03-01T21:53:00.003+08:00

A walk in the forest where you had this feeling you've been here before but you just can't seem to remember. The mist was thick and stretched far and wide throughout the woods. The atmosphere seemed demeaning, but the air was soothing to the lungs. The roots of the trees reached out from the ground , as if they were calling out to me. The autumn leaves fall gracefully and lands perfectly spaced from one another. This is a spooky yet consoling experience that makes life even more suspended.

Wounds of the past might heal, but the certain memories that haunted you before could very well do the same now. We all have our demons and darkness of the past, a hole we dug for a ourselves and yet its the same hole we do not like being in, but all that is important is that we find our way home amongst the mist and the fog that might hinder our sight and lead us off our intended track. How is that possibly done? Would be choices we make along the way.

Being lost is not an embarrassment, Not being found is. =)

Here's a song I feel very much connected to , HAHA! Enjoy =)

Rise Above This

Seether

Take the light, undarken everything around me
Call the clowns and listen closely, i'm lost without you
Call your name every day when i feel so helpless
I'm fallin' down but i'll rise above this, rise above this

Hate the mind, regrets are better left unspoken
For all we know, this void will grow and
Everything's in vain, distressing you though it leaves me open
Feels so right, but i'll end this all before it gets me

Call your name every day, when i feel so helpless
I'm fallin' down, but i'll rise above this, rise above this
Call your name every day, when i seem so helpless
I'm fallin' down, but i'll rise above this, rise above this doubt

I'll mend myself before it gets me
(i'll mend myself before it gets me)
I'll mend myself before it gets me
(i'll mend myself before it gets me)

Call your name every day, when i feel so helpless
I'm fallin' down, but i'll rise above this, rise above this
Call your name every day, when i seem so helpless
I'm fallin' down, but i'll rise above this, rise above this
Forty eight ways to say that i'm feelin' helpless
Fallin' down, fallin down', but i'll rise above this, rise above this

Just A Big ?

2010-02-12T22:00:00.002+08:00

Woooooooo.... Sigh, its really hard to define humans nowadays, its like they have a different set of ideas that cant allow them to see true meaning behind things. It's funny how robbers pay for the crimes of a murderer nowadays, because it is still a crime and sometimes, a robber has to serve his sentence twice because he was judged. Based on? I'm not too sure.

It surprises me to know that good intentions or innocence are mostly taken to not be a plus factor but more of reasons to cover up for your actions. I do believe strongly in conscience and knowing that if it was something that you have done wrong, you would surely have to feel guilty and remorseful about it, but if it was just a small issue ( which I have been told before) and best of all with no ill intentions, do i get a murderer's sentence or serve a robber's?

Oh well, beats me... All I know, I had to do something right and sparing a thought for others may not be such a good idea after all, you still don't get people understanding the meanings behind your actions.

Cheers =)

Can I be your memory...

2010-02-09T22:44:00.003+08:00

Memories are starting to feel like pictures in the year books you see from graduation. You go, " awww ain't that sweet?" and thats about it. Sometimes certain actions in life results you in certain endings that might not be that pleasant but you do know it within yourself the kind of terror that was caused. Well I'm not proud of it, but I would admit, there were several mistakes in life that I made and I would use that to create a new opening in my life.

It is not easy to experience and undergo several situations and moments in your life, and say " No such thing?". That would be utter rubbish and delusional. But knowing certain memories are kept and portrayed as like the pictures in graduation year books , gives you the sense of accomplishment. It shows " Just look at that, I was so young and naive..." and you smile to yourself just by the thought of it.

Then along comes some thing greater and more meaningful in your life and you have your restrictions and limitations. Even so, deep inside , you just know that this is something so special yet so scary because you do not want to make the same mistakes or worse, make new mistakes that might land you in deeper shitholes.

But somehow, we all know certain events take place at a certain point in everyone's life for a reason, and for that reason alone, it gives meaning to a more fulfilling and thrilling road ahead.

And so I say a little prayer...

Guide the lost sheep,
Strengthen the weak,
Feed the hungry,
Quench the thirsty,
In all life you have given, you promised salvation,
I pray that you would offer sinners redemption.

Cheers everyone =)

* Sorry Shawnnnnnnn, if i said anything awkard in front of kamini =P
And Twin is not so awesome today, very moody and unwell. Still can beat me in cards!!! WTF, SMH HAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh Come' On...

2010-02-04T22:16:00.002+08:00

HAHAHAHAHAHA, I'm sorry but when I came across this pic and other stuff, I somehow find a coincidence and link.

But seriously, have you wonder why poop stays in the toilet bowl and not else where, unless you're an overgrown baby who never grew outta diapers? HAHA.

Honestly, I'm just glad that everyone is glad, Shawn and Kamini progressing well, Twin and the guys getting closer, new faces joining us everyday. I see smiles and hear laughter, and it just brings the spirits of everyone up =) I like =)

Sometimes, quotes I used are only meant for me, because I sincerely know when I do say something and if you are not in denial or living in a delusional world, only then should you use certain quotes =)

Oh dam... School's done, this sucks, My shows and movies? Gonna have a hard time trying to track my supplier HAHAH! Bloody fuck! =)

Oh and twin is such an ass la, go Robinsons and Metro sale never buy anything for me =(

Kiddin, anyway, everyone out there , please for the love of God, have a good life and do lead a healthy one too!!!! * smoking does not mean it's unhealthy*

Cheers everyone. =)

O PELEASEEEEEEE...

2010-02-02T09:35:00.004+08:00

Lol, My Twin is making me so gay, which I am obviously not ( please). No matter how much things seem to have fallen apart, we all know it will still piece together and trying to force a break is simply futile.

I just saw the link to the recent case in my school, where a girl's nude photos were posted up on the net and basically her whole future is fucked. It has already reached Stomp. many people tell me that they pity her and no one should go through such torment even if they have been blowjob all these while. My comment is basically, if things you saw coming could have been avoided, avoid it, if you asked for it, then do not feel ashamed for it is an achievement of your work by your own hands.

And so it concludes, sometimes, things might seem like they are so subtle, and you see thieves escaping from their crimes, but sooner or later, it will definitely catch up with you and the payment for your crimes could be excruciating.

* And just a little info for you peeps, that girl deserved it, she posted her own nude pics on her own blog. HAHAHHA, seriously, What the fuck was she thinking?

Boyfriend stealer

2010-02-01T15:55:00.004+08:00

Okay the twin is here to blog :D

I have finally revamped Godfrey's blog, coz sadly he does not have my IT capabilities.

Well, actually he does not have anything. Sad rights?

He is probably going to kill me after seeing his blog,

but oh wells, i am not afraid of the gay boy. In fact i am very

angry with him.

Wanna know what he did?

He gay-ed with my boyfriend.

And its caught on camera.

I mean how could he steal my boyfriend.

i mean i know he is gay and all...but

there's so many guys around.

WHY MY BOYFRIEND???!!!

Oh well, never mind im nice.

I can share.

heheh

xoxo,

liana

Life as it is..

2010-01-25T10:26:00.004+08:00

Jump!! Out from one miserable part of your life to another =)

We all need to go further, be better, accomplish bigger things. We can't stay and harbor on a a line that has already been snapped. It brings us no where to linger, but what we all can do is to have a wider perspective of people and trust.

I'm living the life now, living it to the fullest. I have those that are true to themselves by my side. Those that aren't, a very distant space in between. By as far as I know, losing little by little isn't a loss, it is the beginning of a new gain. =)

LOL!! School still suck to the fucking max la seriously!!!!
And I gotta stop saying OMG in that whatever gay tone they were saying. HAHAHA

* Fuck you shawn... HAHAHAHA

Greenlight..

2010-01-22T12:59:00.003+08:00

HAHAHA, she really made my day. I was just sitting in school with my movies as usual and i had to receive a link that says " Break-up Boot Camp" AHAHHAHAHAHA. I swear it was the funniest shit ever.

My goodness, it was really random and a little late cos I was quite fine since some time ago but at the same time i decided to check it out. It is really a good site for " fresh" victims of break ups even though, chances are they will not take in anything. I had fun reading and it was helpful to me, its not what you peeps are thinking, but its cos, I learn form this advices how i can actually help others like myself or how I was.

And peeps, please wait for my green light and not repeatedly ask if it's time, because it is not.

Have a little patience =)

Anthem Of Our Dying
Story Of The Year

The stars will cry
their blackest tears tonight
and this is the moment that i live for
I can smell the ocean air.

And here i am pouring my heart onto these rooftops
just a ghost to the world
that's exactly,exactly what i need.

From up here the city lights burn
like a thousand miles of fire
and I'm here to sing this anthem
of our dying day.

For a second i wished the tide
would swallow every inch of this city
as you gasp for air tonight.

I'd scream this song
right in your face if you were here
I swear I wont miss a beat
'Cause I never, never have before.

From up here the city lights burn
like a thousand miles of fire
and I'm here to sing this anthem
of our dying day

of our dying day.
of our dying day.
of our dying...

for a second i wished the tide
would swallow every inch of this city
as you gasp for air tonight

from up here the city lights burn
like a thousand miles of fire
and I'm here to sing this anthem
of our dying day

from up here the city lights burn
like a thousand miles of fire
and I'm here to sing this anthem
of our dying day
from up here the city lights burn
like a thousand miles of fire
and I'm here to sing this anthem
of our dying day
our dying day.
of our dying...

*We will all get our just deserved. =)

Poison Seeps...

2010-01-21T09:46:00.003+08:00

The Poison
Bullet For My Valentine

Now, is your time to die
We've gathered here to say goodbye
No, more, you'll cry
No reason left for you to fight

Feel, pain, no more
Emotions never felt before
Where, do, we go
We go, she'll never know

Holding on to you, to keep from falling
Your eyes are closing now
Another chapter's ending

Hard, times, we always saw
There's nothing left of you no more
Fear, has, no place, no place
Cover her face

Holding on to you, to keep from falling
Your eyes are closing now
Another chapter's ending

This is our last goodbye (goodbye!)
This is our time tonight

Holding on to you!

Cover up her face!

Holding on to you... To keep from falling!

Holding on to you, to keep from falling
Your eyes are closing now
Another chapter's ending

This is our last goodbye (goodbye!)
This is our time tonight (goodbye!)

This is our last goodbye!

Make me or break me...

2010-01-20T10:06:00.003+08:00

Wonderous beings human are, or on the contrary, how sick they can actually be.
It's quite a sight knowing the little devious acts done by such, which makes us wonder,
"What is the world coming to?"
I know not of a way to change the course of events but I do know I have sent out warnings way ahead.
Being the middle man and resolving issues does not gives you credit people, it only makes you the fucked up person called " The source of the problem".
Through all these, it is quite obvious to who can be redeemed and who can't.
There is so much more to life than all this childish, immature issues that are being brought up.
Look forward people because here is another sign:

The fallen will rise,
The risen will fall,
The Victims heal,
The Hunters hunted,
The war will be brought among those who have made it happen.
Friends will turn on each other,
Enemies will work together,
This will all happen because no one is able to find the root of the problem, and even if they did, they will not be able/capable to do anything about it.

To Liana,

The good days for you are coming, hang on to that. Never admit defeat to evil , or you will end up being itself. Remember, your qualities as a person outshines anyone, keep that in mind. No one will and can ever make or break you, unless you allow yourself to. =)

Here's a song =)

I Won't See You Tonight Part 1
Avenged Sevenfold

Cry alone, I've gone away
No more nights, no more pain
I've gone alone, took all my strength
I've made the change,
I won't see you tonight

Sorrow, sank deep inside my blood
All the ones around me
I cared for and loved

Building up inside of me
A place so dark, so cold, I had to set me free
Don't mourn for me,
You're not the one to place the blame
As bottles call my name I won't see you tonight

Sorrow sank deep inside my blood
All the ones around me
I cared for and most of all I loved
But I can't see myself that way
Please don't forget me or cry while I'm away

Cry alone, I've gone away
No more nights, no more pain
I've gone alone, took all my strength
But I've made the change,
I won't see you tonight

So far away, I'm gone.
Please don't follow me tonight
And while I'm gone everything will be alright

No more breath inside
Essence left my heart tonight
No more breath inside
Essence left my heart tonight

Enjoy =)

What makes a man?

2010-01-19T09:59:00.003+08:00

What makes a man is not like the above, neither is it showing yourself to be the bigger man.

If there is one thing i've learn so far, being the one who walks away and keep silent from an argument does not make you a coward or a loser, it just shows your status and being the bigger man. There is no need for a fight to prove your worth, it only makes sense when there is a mutual understanding and a certain level of communication equally dealt out to each individual.

Hurt, physically, mentally or emotionally is not caused or inflicted on others, but to yourself. Self delusion kills your instinct of doing what is right and sensible.

Me i'm just a simple and " out of trouble" kind of guy. Taking matters to a whole new level is not what i'm incapable of, its only a matter of necessity.

My friends always tell me, " smile and keep silent because you know when you see yourself as a man" =)

Have you met two face?

2010-01-18T18:47:00.002+08:00

Can i bring you for a plastic surgery?

Oh wait, is there a plastic surgery that helps you create two faces on your head?

Coz if there isn't i would like to start on that business. I can foresee many people lining outside my door asking for my help.

Then it would be a lot easier to see the two face person you are, won't it? :)

If you are being yourself turn one side and come on talk to me.

But when your head is turned to the latter then i know its time for me to back off.

Its funny how you can address me as your best friend, brother, sister etc.

Or even acknowledge me as someone that matters. But seriously?

Did you invent your own dictionary? Do you even know its definition?

Oh wait i am sorry. I forgot, maybe i should buy you a dictionary. It will really help in your life. And your english.

And i say, " two faces is better than one=)"

Go figure =P

*And when you're down and out is where you oughta stay

The Future In Our Hands..

2010-01-16T14:54:00.004+08:00

Things are going haywire, seems fine on the surface, but there is something brewing and I just know it. Oh well, can't really say, what it is when it hasn't been clear or obvious enough to describe. But the thing for sure is a heavy thunderstorm ahead. Each day passes by, and I watch soulfully as distance seems to fall into place. It has begun, only thing I do not know is how far will it go.. Really don't wish to know, just tired and honestly pissed and fucked up.

And seriously, i just had to know about the tent? HAHAHA, it was funny though =)

A Time Of Truth, A Time Of Farewell

2010-01-13T10:02:00.003+08:00

In this world, everything changes within minutes or even seconds. I love enjoying and noticing how an event can show many deep secrets behind closed doors or minor details we might have left out along the way. The past holds discretion and deceit, which we might have known but are unsure of at that time. However, along the way we pick up the small things that are left or given to us slowly but unintentionally. Certain truth is disappointing yet comforting, certain truth is i'm worth celebrating yet still in suspense. All i'm sure of, is my last dance. The achievement in my life of being a person I have always wanted to be, a person of great truth and great guidance, a person who believes in self sacrifice but also self redemption. My journey is coming to an end , and that is the time for that last dance =)

I am not and will not be angry at the truth, but I have to do what I need to do because of the truth. In time we will all understand =)

Aite folks, here's a song I find quite applicable , enjoy =)

Break
Three Days Grace

Tonight
My head is spinning
I need
Something to pick me up
I've tried
But nothin' is working
I won't stop
I won't say I've had enough
Tonight
I start the fire
Tonight
I break away

Break (break)
Away from everybody
Break (break)
Away from everything
If you can't stand
The way this place is
Take
Yourself to higher places

At night
I feel like a vampire
It's not right
But I just can't give it up
I'll try to get myself higher
Let's go
We're gonna light it up
Tonight
We start the fire
Tonight
We break away

Break (break)
Away from everybody
Break (break)
Away from everything
If you can't stand
The way this place is
Take
Yourself to higher places

[Guitar solo]

If you can't stand
The way this place is
Take (take)
Yourself (yourself) to higher places

Break (break)
Away from everybody
Break (break)
Away from everything
If you can't stand
The way this place is
Take (take)
Yourself (yourself) to higher places

Higher places
To higher places
Higher places
Take
Yourself to higher places

Lower than you know..

2010-01-07T10:31:00.001+08:00

How Low
Ludacris feat. Shawnna

[Hook]
How low can you go? [8x]

[Ludacris]
Luda!
She could go lower than i ever really thought she could,
Face down, ass up!
The top of your booty jiggling out your jeans,
Baby pull your pants up,
I like it when i see you do it,
Better then i ever seen it done before,
A lot of women drop it to the ground,
But how low can you go?
Lower then your mama’s ever seen it in her life time,
Never would’ve imagined did not even in her right mind,
Practice in front of that mirror,
Now you doing it on the dance floor,
Mad cause i can’t get wit ya ya just show me how to dance (OH!)
I may not wanna get low so i post it up kinda like a playa do,
But if you come to the crib,
Then i might show you girls a thang or 2,
Yea i think you a superstar wit a ass like that you gotta blow,
Before you make it big,
Theres just 1 thing i gotta know

[Chorus]

How low can you go? [8x]

I could go low, (Go low) lower than you know,
go low,(go low) lower than you know,
go low,(go low) lower than you know,
go low,(go low) lower than you know,
go low,(go low) lower than you know,

[Luda]

I be like Nick-nac-paddywac,
Oh where my kitty cat give a dog a bone,
How many licks does it takes till i get to the center and let a realer n-gga take you home,
I could make me show stop,
Soon as you hear this flow pop,
From A-T-L-A-N-T-A and all the way down to your drop,
Put the needle on a record and i make her get lower than a Lamborghini,
And if she really gettin low then imma shoot a video and put it all on TV,
Cos i like that French vanilla and the caramel,
But when it comes to chocolate,
I know that very well,
Asian persuasion,
no discrimination,
I love how they seen to please us,
I wanna taste them butterican pican peanut buttercups like reeses pieces,
Cause i think you a superstar,
With a ass like that you gotta blow,
Before you make it big,
Well there just 1 thing i gotta know,

[Hook]
[Chorus]

[Ludacris]
Drop it, hit it, dump it, split it,
Don’t stop, (Get it, get it)
Put it on reverse just to rack it up,
Let me put some Luda in it,
Show me what you workin wit,
I’ll show you some of this back row,
Yea you a superstar but theres 1 thing i gotta know though,

[Hook]
[Chorus]

Enjoy =)

The true light is still far from shining

2010-01-07T10:03:00.004+08:00

Recently, everything has started to change. I really am not sure if it is a good or a bad thing, but I do know it is something that lightens and burdens my heart at the same time.

You see, I am glad to know that without me being a part of things and not wanting to know anything, has allowed them to see things for themselves. Most of them at least. Its amazing how the replies that comes from me, when told about current events, are just short and not at all concerned like it used to.

Is it time? Is it friends? Is it an impact so great that it woke me up? I really have no idea. what i do know is one thing. Some things never change, and some things never will.

Sometimes its not about a grudge or hatred, jealousy or self delusion. It is simply damage done that will stay and build up its own future. I am not a divine being so I do not know how things will turn out, but I do know certain devastating consequences if certain kinds of characters are rooted to the selfish and "unknowingly/knowing" sinister core.

All I've got to say is this,

Do not speak of love when you do not know what it truly is.
Do not speak of hurt when you do not know how it truly feels.
Do not exclaim the mess your in if you know it was what you asked for.
Do not blame anyone but yourself, for you are the problem which had already been told to you.
Do not regret if eventually a certain event in your life is too harsh for you to take.
Do not ever make promises or an apology, It's getting old.

What is done can't and never will be undone or amended. I'm just sad and happy for a fact people who deserve salvation are being saved one by one, by themselves.

Like I mentioned before, " This time, I save those I can, and let go of those I can't."

*And Twin I want you to know I'm a person who feels good just by helping others, even if it backfires. And you're that younger twin, I will always look our for and protect. =)

And please i was being honest on FB, not mushy bitch! HAHAHAHAHAHA

Aite everyone, Have a good day =)

Shadows of a long forgotten past...

2010-01-03T14:22:00.004+08:00

Story Of The Year

Sidewalks

The bridge is all crumbled.
The water soaks into rocks
that fell at the bottom of the road (At the end of the town.)
The town that we lived in.
The memories shaken apart from the weeds that grow.

Over the sidewalks,
Running away from the streets we knew,
Sidewalks,
Like the time we thought was made for you.
Or

Out on the front porch,
watching the cars as they go by
(Eighteen blue, twenty one grey)
Looking ahead for the first time that we could drive,
Out on our own,
To speed away

From the sidewalks,
Running away from the streets we knew,
Sidewalks,
Like the time we thought was made for you.
Or

All of the days have passed us by,
All of the sun is gone... away.

Sidewalks,
Running away from the streets we knew,

Sidewalks,
Running away from the streets we knew,
Sidewalks,
Like the time we thought was made for you.
(Sidewalks)
The bridges are crumpled,
(Sidewalks)
The water soaks into rocks,
That fell at the bottom of the road.

* The reality of life is as harsh as the cracks on the roads we travel on.

New Year's a great blessing..

2010-01-02T14:44:00.003+08:00

New Year's, So awesome... It's kinda weird having to see the changes of so many people at one time and the changes ain't that small to begin with. Those are really drastic turns and it came without warning of signal. Some friends stays by your side, some friends leave, some friends are caught in between and are having a hard time.

People whom you thought would have been by your side aren't there, people whom you never thought would still be by your side have always and always will be there. I am thankful for that and I think '09 has taught me a great lesson which is never to hard or tough to learn. I'm just glad I am able to face the start of 2010 with friends and brothers by my side looking out for me all the time.

'09 is the year which I have fallen, '10 is the year I will rise again and be who I really am.

This time, I will keep those I can, and let go of those I can't.

Happy New Year All!!! =)

* Glad to still have my twin =)

( Anyway the girl in the pic is my brother's girlfriend , so pls) HAHAHAHAHA

Silence is a virtue

2009-12-30T12:20:00.006+08:00

O its really been sometime since D'day and wow, i'm standing here strong and proud and still finding certain things in life pretty funny and retarded.

It's like some things in life are so unpredictable and yet it comes and goes without a reason or two. Most of the time it happens when i'm with close friends, they talk to me about things that happen to me and comparing to things that happen to them, and i feel how they feel. They say, " Fuck, everyone makes their fair share of mistakes but the blow dealt to me is uncalled for?". I kinda agree to a certain extent , I do ask myself many times, what do i get for being nice, being selfless being someone who knows his actions are dumb but carries on doing it anyway.

Most times, good people get shit, they get all kinds of shit, from being left at the altar, to car crash, to feeling miserable, to getting cancer.

It's also very convenient to push the blame to others and make themselves sound noble and innocent and best of all " The Victim" so that others will go " Awww, poor thing..." and they go " It's ok, I don't want you to pity me..." and I'll go " Shove those kinky poor thing up yours, 'cause it's so cliche?"

HAHAHAHA, once a cock ass mother fucker always one =)

Cheers mates!

Finally =)

2009-12-19T13:20:00.003+08:00

Hinder – Without You

I just wanna be alone tonight
I just wanna take a little breather
Cause lately all we do is fight
And every time it cuts me deeper

Cause something’s changed
You’ve been acting so strange
And its taking its toll on me
Its safe to say that I’m ready to let you leave

Without you, I live it up a little more everyday
Without you, I’m seein myself so differently
I didn’t wanna believe it then
But it all worked out in the end
When I watched you walk away
Well I never thought id say
I’m fine
Without you

Called you up cause’ it’s been long enough
And you said that you were so much better
We have done a lot of growing up
We were never meant to be together

Cause something changed, you were acting so strange
And it’s taken its toll on me
It’s safe to say that I’m ready to let you leave

Without you, I live it up a little more everyday
Without you, I’m seein myself so differently
I didn’t wanna believe it then
But it all worked out in the end
When I watched you walk away
Well I never thought id say
I’m fine
Without you

Cause something changed, you were acting so strange
And it’s taken its toll on me
It’s safe to say that I’m ready to let you leave

Without you, I live it up a little more everyday
Without you, I’m seein myself so differently
I didn’t wanna believe it then
But it all worked out in the end
When I watched you walk away
Well I never thought id say
I’m fine,
Without you
Without you
Without you
Without you
I just wanna be alone tonight,
I just wanna take a little breather.

* That's all folks =)

Unbelievable =)

2009-12-14T11:27:00.002+08:00

WOW!!! After all the talk and deals and promises time and time again. I really did not expect everything to be just a lie till today, how did you become so low down? Or have you always been like this? The time has already come and this time, I'll only stand and watch. No more sympathies, no more concern and no more hope. I am stone cold and rooted to the very ground where you bury me in, I thought you are changing for the better and for once being truthful, but no more.

Dust and sand fills the spot where your heart should be.

I'm a glass half full? Or a glass half empty?

2009-12-13T23:55:00.004+08:00

This is a question I've been asking myself but I still cant have an explanation for this. My life felt like a full glass but now it feels half as empty. I feel empty inside, no emotions, no feelings , practically a walking zombie?

But at the same time I know what I want but it seems to have left me out of a sudden.

Life sucks, it's like having a candy you thought would bring your sorrows to an end when after feeling so attached to that candy, you just felt you world revolves around it. If you did throw the candy away it's fine and it's really your fault, but what if the candy just decided to drop and taste bitter? How are you going to tell yourself anything?

I just want what I had and I'm more than happy with what I had, I am a simple person who do not require high standards but just deserving what I truly ask for.

*You're the one mistake I really didn't mind ,So beautiful, Unmerciful, It took me down.*

"I remember when you came with me that night
We said forever, that you would never let me go
But here I am again
With nothing left inside
Know I don't wanna
But I gotta let you go"

Honestly, I don't know anything anymore, everything is just blank. Sigh....

To My Guardian Angel =)

2009-12-11T10:43:00.002+08:00

To my Guardian Angel,

HAHA, bitch! Oh well , I really want to thank you for being there for me throughout all this, I know what a mess I've made and I always knew you would stand up and say "I'm proud of you" even if it was so little that I've done. I know being nice in me isn't my best point, but you truly understand how it feels trying not to be nice. I would never give up a Twin like you because , it would be such a waste and disappointment in myself.

I know I have had my fair share of mistakes and foolishness, I promise you with my life I have learnt and I will continue to learn.

Thanks for always being here, watching me supporting me and teaching me. We all might have flawed sometime, but like you said the most important thing is to learn from it.

The guardian angel song is for you =) ( I edit a bit =P)

When I see your smile,
Tears run down my face
I can't replace.
And now that I'm strong I have figured out,
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul.
And I know I've seen deep inside me,
You have been the one.

You have never let me fall,
You stood up for me always,
You've been there for me through it all,
Even if saving me sends you to heaven.

* Liana is a person whom you can count on, but not taken for granted =)

I give hope and i still believe...

2009-12-11T09:53:00.005+08:00

I want to say " Fuck bitch, God dam you !" But no. I will not, I do not hate, I love, I hope and I believe.

It has been an eye opener for me after all that has happen. No doubt , I loved you, if ever I could I would but you were right about one thing, I would be better a distant away from you. Only then I can watch you grow and learn to love yourself and hopefully in tern learn to really love others. We all make mistakes in our lives, some greater than the other, some more hurtful than the other. But the key point to this is not to give up, hope is what we all need.

Don't stop believing in yourself and motivating yourself to be a person worth loving and caring for.

I hope and believe I will see the day when a whole new friend comes to me and just by one glance, I would know your different and better than ever.

I want to thank you for the 1 year and a month that we've been through, it really made my life full in accordance to how I actually felt. I don't hate and I never want to.

I'll be watching from a far as a friend, a good friend, as a guardian. If you need me, do not hesitate.

Here's for you =)

Here I am
This is me
There's nowhere
else on earth I'd
rather be
Here I am
It's just me and you
Tonight we make our
dreams come true

It's a new world
It's a new start
It's alive with the
beating of young
hearts
It's a new day
It's a new plan
I've been waiting for you
Here I am

Here we are
We've just begun
And after all this time
Our time has come
Yeah here we are
Still goin' strong
Right here in the place
where we belong

* Never give up and be strong, you'll make it =)

LIANA!!!!!

2009-12-07T13:27:00.002+08:00

Hi people, i would like you to meet someone not half as awesome as me but about there but not so much close to how awesome spells me maybe just a little tinch... HAHAHA.

Anyway, my twin has been there for me for the past 1 year and trying very hard to force me out of a love i would only live to regret. However, she's just like me, too soft hearted so she couldn't tell me to my face, my ex was just using me, i have to decipher through codes like " National Treasure" =P Oh well even when I figured that part out, it was so messy, I actually thought it was love in the relationship. It's funny because she believed what i did in the course of the relationship, i did it out of pure love and sincerity. I expected her to believe someone else, but she held on to the truth, she held on to me and became my pillar of support, she shed the same blood and tears that I did after being treated this way, when she was not even in the exact position i was in but she broke down because she felt my hurt and the scar that has marked me for life, because of a girl whom she thought she knew.

I want to dedicate this post to her. To thank her for being here, to prove to me that she is not like her even though they are friends. To stand up for what is right and to stand up for herself.

I am proud of you Liana, just like how you are proud of me =)

I just hope you can help your friends realise that what she did to me was wrong and not only to me, but as long as her actions and mentality sticks, she will suffer dire consequences.

Help her alright babe? =)
Like how me help you =P

O and you babat is cute keep it that size , too big later not nice. =P

I gave you life, you took mine..

2009-12-07T12:51:00.003+08:00

It's no more about hate and anger, it's now just all about disappointment. Before we even get together I made it clear that I do not want to play around and I am serious about us. You gave me words that turned to lies, you gave me promises that turned to nothing, you did this not only to me but to many others before me. I thought i knew you, but now i don't, I knew i loved you, but now i don't, but knowing that everything you have ever said to me for the past 1 year was a lie, it really has scarred me and i have you to thank for that.

Humans have a heart and they have feelings, you don't. You only have in your mind want you think is better and you don't give a dam wad the other person went through because of you. You think selfishly for how you want to feel and not a single sign of remorse for what you have done to others. Do not use arguments and excuses to cover up your true intention and problem within yourself. You really think the world is stupid enough to accept that? Wrong! You can lie to my friends all you want and you can even leave me for my close friends, the truth will not hold forever and the consequences will be unbearable.

If you really treat me as a friend, even after what you have done to me, my only advice to you is to change before it is too late, let me save you while you still can. When you cross a point of no return, it's too late.

I am not afraid to say that i have loved you for the past 1 year and it would be a lie for me to say i have lost everything now. But i can only say i still believe that you can change and save yourself, don't disappoint me and everyone around you who cares for you.

In time you will know what i mean.

Mode of Death: Suicidal , Accidental, Old Age?

2009-11-16T15:13:00.003+08:00

I love my life and you.

I love having to make my dearest happy even if I ain't.

I love smiling knowing that things will be different, only better.

I love having to speak up and talk about everything cos there is nothing I can't do to help.

I love thinking of my death only that I died doing my task in this world and leaving when He comes to call .

I love having the ability to share emotions with the one i love when I really need to.

I love life being unfair to me, it allows me to see the world better and how we should change it together.

I love sharing my happiness with you dearest.

I love being happy. I love having to see you smile and giggle.

I love having to understand everyone but myself because it brings them peace.

My dearest, these are written not by me but by yourself. This is who you are and who you want to be. Bright, cheerful and full of smiles. You are beautiful and sweet, control the dark past of yours and do not allow it to emerge, because I am here and I bring light, let me help you =)

Suicide is a very good way of having your life end earlier that arranged. Wonders in life are too many for a person to fully appreciate and enjoy, why waste that opportunity when you have so much more to love and enjoy before He calls us?

I tell you this because I love you, so please confide in me alright? =)

* Your choice to the title is - Old Age ( Don't even think about anything else)

And so are you to me...

2009-11-14T01:29:00.002+08:00

I do not want you to be anyone else but yourself, only better. You do not have to suit to everyone, only important people in your life. It is time you prioritize and make decisions for yourself that you never thought you would be able to. It's time to step up and fight for yourself, not against me, but with me. I am always here for you and i know things i say may not be the right words or tone because after all I'm still a man and I too have to be better than this.

I'll never give up on you, and i hope you will not too. Even if I to die helping you I will, and this is my word I swear upon my life. Do not keep things to yourself anymore for I am here to listen, advice, hold you close and keep you from sorrows and harm.

I love you very much too my dear and I hope we'll embrace that. =)

* No more wet pillows pls?

Just trying to lend a helping hand...

2009-11-03T09:36:00.004+08:00

I know how we were and i've been trying to go back and be how we were. It is in every way possible. It is tiring and maybe the arguments are because of anger, but we have to learn to keep to our parts of the compromise and keep compromising to improve things.

I'm sorry you had to keep crying, which is why i am trying to prevent by helping you, but i really do not know how i can get it across to you how you have to be brave and not place everything as a worry.

When you do not know, i'm there to teach you give you knowledge and guide you, but you have to do your part but believing and listening. I guarantee you, when that happens , you will have your carefree kind of life, because you know i can be as carefree. =) I will not give up the fight to support and protect you, but you have to learn how to protect yourself to help me protect you =)

Do not always feel that everything is because of you, we go through things together, if there is a fault it is both, doesn't matter who started it, the whole point is not to say " everything is cos of me" but it should be " Hey what happen? Let's tackle the issue and not let it happen again" This way my dear, will be our support and tool to prevent things from happening. =) ok dear?

Hehe, I love you =)

Sometimes it just take a while to really listen and accept help that will bring you a long way....

* just a smile on your face lets me know that you need me

How I could I be so helpless....

2009-10-21T12:09:00.004+08:00

O God, this sucks, sometimes i really wonder what are guys suppose to do when girls have their " monthly "in-come". Its like, their moods change like the directions of the wind and in fact, sometimes it stays for sometime. I try ways to make her smile, but i get reactions like, " ya whatever la seriously" , " Huh, erm ok..." and even my funniest jokes (It is funny ok!) does not work on her. So hard to please and try to make her day better. I mean i can understand the "Swings" and all but , things said to me that shows me your becoming your old self again is really hitting me hard. O well, sometimes I'm trying to get through to you that there are certain things that i really do not like or are uncomfortable with, and there are certain things that you are uncomfortable with, we both have to give and take.

Sometimes i really am so helpless and i just wish you could be the one who help me, but it wont make sense because your the one i am suppose to help , so i cant possible expect you to help me know what to do right? HAHA

Anyways, I hope i'll get to know how to deal with these situations and help you feel better even though i know i really suck at it, even when you cry ( You know that very well * hmmph**fold arms*)

Love you dear, i'll try k?

Please please do not keep things from me ever again, it really will fuck up the trust issue.

Appreciate you being truthful in the end =)

Love you loads =)

Time and Time again....

2009-10-02T09:56:00.003+08:00

Right now all you can see in my eyes are spaces.

Before i start my blog i wanna apologize to God, because i had been so stubborn and didn't follow what he gave me. I had the choice to feel happy and contented and like nothing really mattered to me, but i caved in when promises of a better understanding and gift that awaits me which never comes. Time and time again really, all i do is to believe and trust, but all i get in return is disappointment and each time it only gets worst. I was told i cant expect people to understand me, even the one closest to my heart.

But my question is, do i have to even expect? Or should it have come naturally?

Why is it that i cant expect anything and why cant people take the initiative to feel the people around? Why am i always taken like a fool?

" Too nice a guy," they say. Really? I hear mocking behind those words.

" Too Dumb a guy," they sniggered.

I've trusted even when i do not have to or have every reason not to, I've allowed what i should have denied and yet, is this what i get in the end?

Mockery? Betrayal? Deceit?

It is really not so much on the matter of feeling bad or feeling down or whatsoever. I'm more concern on the part where what is done or carried out to improve things. Actions speak louder than words, I've been promised repeatedly of actions to prove the worthiness, but I've yet to be convinced.

I'm just so disappointed i wish God would sent her the wisdom and love to feel what i feel and to know what i think and to keep to her promises of a greater yet simple change.

God if you're out there, please shower her with your blessings , give her the wisdom you gave to our ancestors, give her the wisdom of your knowledge and give her the strength to be truthful and persevere. I offer this silent prayer in Love. Amen.

Bitter Sour Salty and Sweet. 4 Different taste, I only have one.

A silver lining after every storm..

2009-09-26T16:17:00.002+08:00

Well peeps there is one reason why i hate apples, and this is how the story goes...

I've been sick you see, sick for far too long, and its not the common illness people catch. People usually get down with flu and even then, they recover at the most a week or 2. Well i caught this bug when i was 12.

Back when i was in Primary 6, i used to think that life was just a nibbling of nuggets, licking of ice cream and not knowing that one drop of chocolate has already landed on my shirt and then comes the fear of parents nagging and then back to school the next day.

However, one day my bosom friend curiously asked me, " Hello, you got girl friend yet?" .

Then everything started to change, i started wondering what is a girl friend , what is he talking about and why is he asking me, should i be having one? But little did i know the bug was already attached to my skin like a leech.

So it stayed that way for another 3 years, with me going through the usual cycle, until i met this fine young lady who makes my heart beat so fast ( without even touching it). I wasn't so sure then, but decided to just leave things and go with the flow.

I really do not know if it was a good or bad thing, that bug started to exist and i can feel its presence, really spooky...

Its like every time i see a couple i think of her, and it starts coming back.

Well eventually we got together and we have our ups and downs, but you know

the bug never left, it only appears when she's not around or when she's giving me a hard time.

So many advice me to see a doctor and told me to get myself treated by a professional, and so i did.

I went to visit a medical professional and he told me,

" Ah boy ah, you eat one apple everyday, you confirm ok already... "

So i curiously asked why, and he replied, " you see like all doctor tell you one apple one day keep the doctor away.." and before i could try to explain to him how i felt,

" Here take this apple and eat then you forever no need see doctor already... " he interrupted and smiled. ( what a jackass)

God dam you, dick brain.

I've been diagnosed with the illness called (love "sick") and your telling me to eat an apple everyday so i never will be able to see my (love "doctor")

I'm love sick bitches, i need my love doctor !!

HAHAHAHHA

Just bored sorry =P

The Flame Is Rising

2009-07-28T12:24:00.006+08:00

The fire seems so small and harmless. Try pissing the one who controls it and the last thing you'll see is the burning hot flames in your eyes. The rage is building and i hate this feeling. Last night was the one night of my whole entire life i ever felt so lost, angry, hateful and sad. I have whatever i need here with me but factors that are not part of my life has got themselves involved and created a wild fire. I fucking hate them and all of them, some selfish people who cannot accept another takes out their actions on us. Remember one thing i ain't your fucking puppet, this is my life and i have every fucking GOD DAM right to choose how i wanna live it and who i wanna live it with. Maybe if you fuckers are not so prejudice, you may see that you guys are so clouded by you dumbfuck tradtional beliefs which has utterly nothing to do with us being together. We all have our choices and i made mine, i have every fucking right to and so does she. You have the authority to question my choice but i reserve my right not to give an explanation or justification. There is no need to!! Stop telling me to fucking break up because you care because it is not working. We are not like having our own quarrels and differences and you " goody 2 shoes" step in to say ," Hi, i think its advisable for you guys to stop fighting and maybe you should just be friends?" BUT NO!! you fucking create problems because you are unhappy and you cant get through me cos i dun give a fuck, you use others to make my life a living hell. Fucking pathetic, i've grown tired of your threats and you know what i really dun give a fuck about severing ties. Doesn't matter to me, if you cant fucking understand what i'm having and what's so good about this, good for you! Just stay the fuck out of my life deal with whatever by yourself to yourself. Do not bring others into this! This is the last warning, the rage inside me is building, it was just a spark of what i am capable of doing, you do not want to see what i can do and will do when the wild fire spreads uncontrollably!!!

I swear to GOD, if ever our love is to be broken by force due to selfishness, I pray that GOD will forgive them and spare them the eternal flame because I WILL NOT!!

No One Is Innocent

2009-06-18T11:40:00.002+08:00

No one fucker is innocent i tell you. Yes my dumb fuck dad keeps doing things that will piss the shit outta anybody, but he could not have done it alone without the help of Her. She went to entertain his call and even mention things like, " Her father wanted to slap her". WTF is that for? you are agreeing with my dad and telling him that he is right even though you do not say it. By making that fucking statement its already agreeing with him and pls, o for god's sake pls, stop thinking that people are naive because for one, i am definitely not and i definitely never will be. You are the first fucker who was so against it in the very first place and brought religion into the picture and if you are that innocent, why don't you tell it to my mother fucking face you fucking overaged cunt! It's some nice acting you got there, she can believe your words but i will never and i will expose your fucking bull shit to her and make her realise that all you are doing is an act and you claim is for "her own good". Fuck you bitch, i ain't stupid, you are more than happy that my dad is making noise cos for one, you can use that as an excuse to get what you want, and two you can point the blame to others and not your fault. So pls, dun treat me like a fool, i've seen people like you my whole 19 years and trust me, not a single one of them ever survived a challenge against me. So you can take your fucking lies, act and deceit and shut it up your mother fucking ass. So fucking typical, hiding the whole truth, and you can lie through your teeth.

*baby, the main female in this is not you, i think you know Her very well*

I Can't Wait To Hit The Half Year Mark....

2009-05-08T00:00:00.000+08:00

It's coming and it's coming real soon =) I have only one wish every monthsary, i only wish that God can help us to stay this way til the day we die =) Well even after death also =P. I have something prepared for you so just relax and wait, this post is meant for our monthsay. " After all that has happen, i'm not giving up on us, i'll always be here and i'll always love you, ging you you all that i can. Hopefully you are able to see the hard truth of the world that if you do not step up and stand up for yourself, you will never be able to fufill your dreams. Sometimes and many times in life we all have to make a choice,. I chose you and the rest is up to you =) I love you and please stay happy =P. O hope you like my gift ="}

Happy 6th Month BABY!!!!! *big kiss right smack on you face* HAHAHAHAH

It Just Seem So Far...

2009-05-03T20:51:00.006+08:00

I'm missing her like crazy, every minute seems to be an hour and every hour seems to be a day. I tried to hold back but i cant, i get so furious at the fact that i cant be there with her and even contact her coz of the mother fucking stupid starhub and their fucking rude customer service, that i cant even get to contact her. Still, knowing that her " " still irritating her and saying things about me and at the same time spoiling her only time to enjoy, i couldn't do anything. It feels so helpless knowing 2 people are in love but with selfish reasons they are being denied that right. I hate them, i hate them to the fucking core, please open up your fucking eyes to see that the world has changed, realise, mentality has changed, realise this ain't your world. I love her with all my heart and i will do whatever it takes to protect her. A close friend told me, "All i can do is to put in a 70% at this time, untill she has found her courage and fight for what she wants, then we both can put in a 100%. If i am putting 100% now, i will be the one who's gonna get hurt the most. " I will try but my heart tells me i want to put in a 110%. I can't sleep nor eat, i can speak nor hear attentively. I can only pray that God answers my prayers and give her the strength to find a faith she truly believes and chooses, to fight for what she wants, to fight for her happiness, to fight for...me.I'm just waiting for her to return safely.......

Do you know where your heart is
Do you think you can find it
Did you trade it for something, somewhere
Better just to have it
Do you know where your love is
Do you think that you lost it
You felt it so strong but nothings
Turned out how you want it
Well bless my soul
You`re a lonely soul
Cause you wont let go
Of anything you hold
Well all I need is the air I breathe
And a place to rest my head
Do you know what your fate is
And are you trying to shake it
You`re doing your best and
You`re best look
You`re praying that you`ll make it
Well bless my soul
You`re a lonely soul
Cause you wont let go
Of anything you hold.........

I'll never stop loving you.....

Don't Push It, For I Do Not Fear..

2009-04-27T21:36:00.003+08:00

I do not fear what's coming, i fear losing you. Having a fact that i am so deeply attached to you i don't want to lose you.

I can never tolerate a problematic person who creates problems for people for personal gain. I hate mother fuckers like that and trust me i was this close to "silencing" him. I think back and asked myself, is he worth? All i wanted was to protect the one that i love.

God gives us signs, God teaches us values, humans make mistakes, repeating it when knowing that it is wrong does not give God the reason to allow you to do so. Here you are claiming that your religion is strict and you speak like you're pious, the truth is , you have just violated a human moral right and your own religious belief. So please, don't ever speak to me about religion because as far as you're concern, you are my enemy. Mark my words, the next time you push it, I will not hold back. Such a hypocrite, *spit on your face bitch*

My love, its good that your going somewhere for a break, i think its really good for you, to get your mind off things and relax. To me, the biggest gift is you coming back safe and sound and happy because you've enjoyed yourself. We all have our flaws and sometimes we just have to do what we have to do. Understanding won't come easy, but knowing that we've tried, its good enough for us to let go( you know what i mean* not us*). I will pray everyday for your safety and for God to give you his blessings to keep you calm. I love you and like i said, i will not let anything stand in my way.

I can keep taking a step back, but don't push me to the corner. I will be ME!

Why, just Why?

2009-03-24T14:45:00.003+08:00

I really hate the fact that plans keeps screwing up at the last minute and it is really irritating to see that you can just end the conversation by saying, " You wanna meet or not just let me know." like as if i was the one with the last minute changes and the " o we don't have a choice". It's like telling me after falling sick, " I need to see a doctor" , ya i know that right? The question is how did it become a " dun have a choice". I really don't wanna blame you or anything but really, maybe the time will come when things you plan not only once but a couple of times just get screwed up because i agreed on something and within a split second it changed and then i tell you, " we don't have a choice", we'll see how you gonna feel. I've already tried to plan, tried to find alternatives, but even then, it doesn't go smoothly or even so at all. I'll just continue to do what i can, but just remember i'm human, there will come a time when things just can't go any further, please, do not look at me, coz you made the choice already. 2 days in a row!!! Unbelievable!!

Twenty-Fourth Day
Evening

O God, forgive me for allowing myself any wrong thoughts
to enter into my mind today.
Forgive me for allowing my eyes to linger on
things at which i should not even have looked at.
Forgive me for speaking words which i should
never have allowed to soil my lips.
Forgive me for needlessly giving temptation a
chance to attack me.
Forgive me for all the things which i am sorry
now, and grant to me, before i sleep, the sense
of being forgiven and the kiss of pardon and of
peace.
This i ask in Your love's sake. Amen

Grace From Above

2009-03-13T11:52:00.004+08:00

I really would love to save the world from loneliness, sadness, disappointment, temptation, cruelty and damnation. I have decided that we are all humans after all and really i have started to pick up my faith again and i never stop praying for the grace and strength for me to feel what others feel, experience what others go through see and think how others think. i pray for the grace of forgiving and continue spreading the love that God gave me. My love, you're the first stage and test God has put me through and I'm sure there are more people out there that needs someone to cry on and confide in, I am not God, but i am born to do good in his image. people like, Logan, Kart, Shawn, these are the few people i have to also be there for, trust me, it is not as easy as it seems, after all I'm still human, i have my limitations all i can do is to try to help you be a better person and be strong both in mind and emotions, I'll forever be here and I love you too.
Here's a Prayer for today and its really amazing how relative the prayers are to each day and its events.

Thirteenth Day
In The Morning

O God, help me all through today,
To do nothing to worry those who love me
To do nothing to let down those who trust me
To do nothing to fail those who employ me
To do nothing to hurt those who are close to me

Help me all through this day,
To do nothing which would be a cause of temptation to someone else or which would make it easier for someone else to go wrong
Not to discourage anyone who is doing his best
Not to dampen anyone's enthusiasm or increase anyone's doubt

Help me all through this day,
To be a comfort to the sad
To be a friend to the lonely
To be an encouragement to the dispirited
To be a help for those who are up against it.
So grant that others may see in me something of the reflection of God, whose i am and whom i seek to serve.
This i ask for Your love's sake. Amen

Lost and Insecure

2009-02-27T11:56:00.004+08:00

I've been trying so hard for the past few months to try to help you find yourself, but sometimes i just wonder, why am i trying? I don't need a reason in future to fight and try, because i am doing that now. To me, crying every night thinking about me proves to me nothing but showing your weakness when comes to emotions. I don't blame you but at the same time, its not sweet to cry for someone every night for like the smallest and things that don't amount to you crying for. I mean think about it, you cry almost every time. Honestly, this is not the kind of relationship anyone would wanna be in, especially for me. I want a serious and mature relationship, you know what, i'm not afraid to say this again, I'm not your past relationships and i dunno if i will be your future, much that i want to, but i am your present. I mean, i don't really know or care how it was with them, trust me, i know how they feel abt things when you cry, " O, haha, she's so attached to me, now i'm in command....." Too bad that's them, those typical mother fuckers. All i need is to see you strong and be consistent in whatever you think or do or say. It really gives me insecurity knowing that i have to think twice about what you say and be prepared that at any point in time, it will change. It's really tiring me out and like i said, even at the end of the day, your words are taken back, i won't blame you, this is just what i do. It doen't matter if my world has only me in it, cause 'brothers' that were assuring me they are always there, were never there, it's a hard fact of life but i'll just accept it, besides Kart now, i don't see another person's name in my message or call register. I'm learning to keep consistent to stand alone and be independent, and i dunno if you want that to, but dun just say it, show me.

O this suck!!

2008-12-16T19:55:00.004+08:00

Well recent events weren't as good as it seems. My bro shawn left for army and it kinda feels weird when he isn't around. It just hits me when i feel that i neglected him before he went to NS and now i'm missing him like fuck. Well i can be a moron sometimes but he is like a brother to me for the past years and i'm sure many years to come. My love met Mr. Bondz at last before he went in. Finally met up with my old peeps after like *ages* and ya it was great seeing them. I miss Shawn like FUCK!!! HAHAHA, love you bro.

Christmas is drawing near and i'm gonna be away for five days to HK. It really sucks to be unable to spend my first christmas with the one i love and i'm so fucking sure it'll affect her so bad.I'm really sorry for not being able to spend this Christmas this year with you but i'll be back for New Year.I'm sorry for being an ass since the time we got together and i really appreciate you understanding. I shall have a New Year resolution soon and it will be for you =) I love you loads babe =P

Peace out !!

2008-12-10T18:24:00.000+08:00

I'm so sorry, and its really not your fault, fuck i hate myself, but i love you!!! =P

What A Wonderful World

2008-12-06T11:58:00.005+08:00

Fuck off !!! To anyone who tries to stop me from doing what i wanna do with my life. I am your son, so hurl as much insults at me as possible , i don't care, coz i'm like so fucking used to it. But do not hurl insults at my friends and buddies. You're a fucking cunt face blowjob who's like fucking irritating and nosey and so fucking paranoid( now i know where i got that from). Seriously if you wanna know what's the best for me, just stay outta my fucking life and leave me alone!!! Fuckhead!! =) And Dearie I love you!!! MUAHAHHAHAHAHA.....(the evil laughter continues)

I'm Sorry

2008-11-27T22:16:00.004+08:00

Hmmm, i really hate RP and the stupid Art Project, like the facilitator is being an irritating bitch and fucking annoying like most of the times( trying to be nice, its actually most of the time). Then coz of this, i had to go home early to do it and i'm so fucking sure its not gonna be completed as i have lost all my data when my com reformatted =( I can't even concentrate la and i'm not even sure why am i wasting my time on this stupid project. Worse still, cash is running low on me, this is not what i was planing for, i'm definitely gonna get a freaking job, and hopefully it will lighten up my worries now, coz i really wanna provide the best for not only myself, but YOU. So ya, time to slog your guts out and get MONEY!!!!
AHAHHAAH Oh my god!!!
Miss you so much =)

I remember the look in your eyes
When I told you that this was goodbye
You were begging me not tonight
Not here, not now
We're looking up at the same night sky
And keep pretending the sun will not rise
Be together for one more night
Somewhere, somehow

* Remember?

Loving you

2008-11-26T23:32:00.003+08:00

HAHAHAHA, its been a great day today, got into a little trouble with ANSON but now its aite, hahaha, seems to me everyone is having something inside of them that is bothering them, but they just don't know how to let things go as planned, learn to chill. Sometimes when one has done as much as he or SHE can do, its time to leave it and start thinking about yourself. YOU are not being selfish just because you can't do more, YOU are being selfish because YOU are not doing more for YOURSELF. There is a limit to what we can do, do not push YOUSELF over the bar, becasue the fall will be hard. YOU know who i'm talking about =P

" Love has no boundaries, Its a one way street; Giving, Giving, Giving."

Love ya babe =)

I Never Wanted To

2008-11-24T09:09:00.007+08:00

HMMMMM, I feel like i've been stabbed 15 fucking times... But still, hmmm, something just feels different.Maybe its you or maybe its me, but whatever it is, i shall just brush it aside, for it is we who makes life better =) My Bondzie going army soon, gonna miss him and on the eighth of december is gonna be a fucked up day, time is drawing near...

We've had one chance to take back

But over and over again(I'll clean your wounds tonight)

So we can rewind it all 'til I come inside

I'll tear in two and never lie to you('Cause you wouldn't take me home)

Your eyes are yet to be clear now('Cause you wouldn't take me home)

You were right, I wasn't listening(I never told you what you were missing)

From a Fade to a Smile

2008-11-18T23:15:00.003+08:00

Like i've always said, " look out for the good in life, its easy to miss it, but when you try hard enough and keep it, it's gonna make you feel the importance of you in your life and the life of others." Tonight, even a problem i thought would have never been erased from my life, has been subdued and overcomed by a powerful wonder that appeared. It is easy for us to see the down side of life and sigh about how unfair life is and" why does it have to be me, why do they have such a good life?". The question is,Who ever said that life was fair? Who ever said that not everyone has a good life? To me a good life depends on how you want to live it. Take for example a person born of physical disabilities, he or she gets laughed at despised at and discriminated against. But why do i still see these people roaming the streets, living life like it is as good as any millionaire out there? It is ok to experience the shits of life, its normal, but to cling on to it as your life buoy is not really a good support, because out there in the vast ocean, are treasure waiting to be found. Be a smart treasure hunter, not a pirate. My dear folks, love and life are the same, we have to keep what we can and let go what we can't. Do look out for the wonders around you and feel comforted that there are angels amongst us, miracles that saves us, a hand stretched to offer aid and guidance. Love you peeps!

FUCKING DUMB FUCK

2008-11-18T15:31:00.004+08:00

G, you are so fucking stupid i think the cows can moo faster than your senses can work!! Why don't trust your instincts, why make yourself look so stupid and desperate and why feel guilty now? You're such an ass, the whole motto of helping and saving people, " The Good Samaritan" has now become, " The Fallen One"!! its interesting how one can fuck things so bad, i doubt there will be any turning point, i will still continue to do what i can for people, but this is gonna stick with me for a very long time, maybe its fate or maybe its just what God has planned for all of us, i'm gonna try to enjoy what i have now and not do anymore stupid things under any circumstances. When its time to let go, i'll know my flaws and my deeds, and i shall live on to do good.

2008-11-17T18:08:00.002+08:00

The love of my life has just stepped into my lonesome retarded life =P. Its really funny how two people meet and come together as one to share the joy nd pains that each goes through. We'll never know what tmr will bring, so just enjoy what we have today. I know i'm such an ass sometimes but i'll do whatever it takes to make you smile, even though there are obvious problems or complications that i know are gonna occur, i'll never regret a day letting you into my life, like i said, you're the best thing that has ever happen to me! Dun let anyone tell you otherwise!OK ME VERY FULL NOW, meeting me dearie later, so till then you peeps just chill out aite? HAHAHA!!

2008-11-11T12:25:00.000+08:00

HAHAHA, it's been fast, but i feel at ease, at least now we know what we are looking for. Well, things did not go well for both of us in the past, but hopefully and just hopefully, we'll make it against all odds, and just so you know, " I'm all about you" =)

Light in the dark

2008-11-09T22:25:00.000+08:00

Life hasn't exactly been going well for everyone, there are quarrels, heartbreaks, exams, stress, disputes over trival matters, people taken for granted, people lost in love, sinners, losers, the confused, the bitches and the assholes, everyone has been fucked up in one way or another. But why trouble yourself when life is full of surprises for you to enjoy and learn. From my darkest days so far, the thing i realised is that every problem you faced, every obstacle that comes your way, every slap you get in the face deserves a round of applause. Why? These things happen because you are destined to learn from it and laugh it off as a joke. Laughing keeps people's spirits high, never face a problem and brood over it because whatever it is has happen, now its time to think, what is my next step? Do i continue crying, shouting, screaming , yelling or even screwing around wasting your life away? Life is short, sweet and simple.It's the responsibilities that allows us to feel otherwise.We try our very best to deal with whatever that comes, but when it is over, let it go. Do not do things to harm others because it will come back to you one day, I am not a perfect being myself, but to you guys who are reading this, I believe that there is good in everyone, it is just how you wanna use it to benefit mankind and in return, your task as a fellow human being is being fulfilled.

" Treat others as you would like to be treated, Do not do unto others what others do unto you, Love your enemies, Treasure your love ones."

Have a nice day people =)

And remember, always put on a smile =)

B**** are you retarded?

2008-10-23T23:20:00.000+08:00

Had a long and tiring day, school was AWESOME!!!. Happening things happen, whatever that means. Finally " got it off my chest....... the story ends.....!!!", and BOOM! all hell breaks loose, we all decided to have a little chitty chat chat session, turns out there is not point in that, all i can say is, Fucking Retarded people got no fucking brains and i seriously wonder what do they use to think with? Hmmm let's see, i can't think of any. O well, finally started on my PP poster, i feel good having to embark on something, but on the other hand, my Final Theory Test is tommorrow, i don't feel ready =(. Today just did'nt seem as good as i thought it would be, well at least i cleared the air especially on my part, but then again, it is up to you to believe. Everything lies in your own hands, make choices, don't regret, learn from mistakes! "Treat others the way you would like to be treated" =)
Bouncing off, FUCKINGCUMBUCKETCUNNILINGUSANALINGUSSELFFELATIO,PIECEOFTWOCENTSWORTH OFSHIT!

2008-10-17T11:28:00.000+08:00

Haha, i'm back bitches. My RP homies decided to slack at the cafe. It was fun, but at the same time it was kinda tiring. Very sleepy. Life has been getting very boring nowawdays, it seems like forever for a day to pass, mygrades aint that good either, But here's a line i love, haha for my fuckers out there, " BITCHES THEY COME THEY GO, SATURDAY TO SUNDAY MONDAY, MONDAY TO SUNDAY YO, MAYBE I"LL LOVE YOU ONE DAY, MAYBE WE"LL SOMEDAY GROW, TILL THEN JUST SIT YOUR DRUNKASS ON THAT FUCKING RUNWAY WHORE!!!"

HAHAH rocking out.

Funny Madness

2008-09-15T18:02:00.000+08:00

Its been a while since i blogged, but not to worry, i shall try my very best to keep it updated. Shawn has shown deep interest in my blog but it usually turns out to be a joke, well its not always a bad thing. Since the last time i wrote, many events occurred, mostly unfortunate ones which didn't really end the way i hope it will. Advice from my homies and close friends was kinda conflicting and confusing, I was left hanging on the line, a very thin line. At different points in time, i feel helpless and abandoned, i see myself in similar positions i was before, standing at the spot where my life was on the rock, however, this time was kind of different, i was not really in the position where people try to solve my problems, but more of vice versa. It feels good being able to help others as others has once helped me. I have been selfless all this while and never new how to be selfish for the right reasons. When i met someone who was going through the torment i experienced, i felt that it was time to teach that person how to be selfish at one moment but save lives at the end of the day, i always imagine people running towards me shouting, " Thank you, you made my life perfect!" Thoughts ike these inspire me to work towards my goal and never give up the dream to help others attain what i could not have. I love you my brother!! " Really ah Shawn?"

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

The Beginning Of An End

2008-07-22T10:44:00.000+08:00

I feel relieved after all that has happen and i think its time i let it go. Feeling sorry for him is all that i can do and hope that he might see the light one day, with shawn and stanley as my support, i feel that i did the right thing and i should let him learn things the hard way. What i really can't take it lying is that i lost a brother, a friend over some Slut which untill 22th july, Tuesday,10:59 , still did not reveal the truth and the whole truth to him. To best part of this whole saga is that she still has the cheek to says things to me to make her sound Noble and a nominee for the Nobel Prize( I know its lame), creating an impression that i owe my life to him and all that he has done for me. To me it is just an excuse to play with my mind ( and just so you know SLUT i'm not affected by it and i think your really desperate to make such a comment) but you know, i'm not like you i don't compare how much i did for people even if i really do regret doing it at the end of the day for him. I don't complain, i don't use it as a desperate attempt to salvage something you have screwed up, i'm not someone who will clean up the shit you left behind. So please, i beg you, don't come talking to me like you have the right to or even deserve for me to listen to, cause your nothing but a LIAR and a HYPOCRITE, so why don't you enjoy the time with you lovely boyfriend because it will be the last when he finds out the truth, it is so obvious when you try to cover things up, the guilt in your voice says it all. Finally, i can only hope in prayer that he will come to his senses one day that " A leopard never changes its spot". It's just over and i'm glad you made your choice. Shawn if you read this... FUCK YOU!!! HAHAHA

Disappointment

2008-07-03T09:26:00.000+08:00

Homie o Homie, you do what you did because you got angry which to me is what i felt when you kept things from me, as i see it, there is not point getting angry because you are doing the same to me. I can't accept the fact that you chased her out of the house with crude remarks, i don't know what other things you did exactly, but know this, i will always be your brother, no matter what, just don't do things to disappoint me. You know that i'll take a bullet for you, but now, i'm not sure you'll do the same, but if you will, please heed my advice, apologize to her and stop this "No good outcome" dispute. Love you bro. I hope MGLS will stay as Homies For Life, Please don't disappoint me.

Fucking Complicated Saga

2008-07-03T09:12:00.000+08:00

Hatred to PUSSIES who do not have the guts to admit their wrongdoings and instead point the Fucking finger at people. Think about it, if you didn't do what you did in the first place, none of this would have taken place, and even if we take things as they have happened, the Fucking least of remorse you show and Fucking mean will help so much better. Why put on a "Performance" when you don't mean wht you say and your audience gets pissed when they know your lying, Futhermore, don't go round gaining pity from people because it just goes to show what a loser and a unforgivable, lying, weak, poser, bigheaded, self obsessed and living in denial Slut! So lastly, Do not show attitude like people owe you an explanation or an apology, because the world owes you nothing and trust me YOU ARE JUST A PART OF THE WORLD, THE WORLD DOES NOT STOP REVOLVING BECAUSE OF YOU, SO JUST FUCK OFF AND DON'T EVER APPEAR TO BE NICE AND DEMURE, YOU FUCKING STUPID SLUT! PATHETIC !

2008-06-25T03:49:00.000+08:00

to handle yourself, use your head, to handle others, use your heart.
anger is only one letter short of danger.
friends, you and me.. you brought another friend... and then there was three... we started our group... our circle of friends... and like that circle, there is no beginning and no end.. and so yesterday is history, tomorrow is mystery and today is a gift. a present. a present event..

Friendza

2008-06-24T21:34:00.000+08:00

Everyone goes tru similar situations at different phase of their lives. Friends are just passing bridges linking you to another path. I hope everyone is coping well and my homies so rule la!

'And a word to the wise when the fire dies
You think it's over but it's just begun..'

Soccer Sunday

2008-06-16T09:31:00.000+08:00

We went at 11 in the morning and started the game very soon after. Weather was fine, but the winnings were little, we almost didn't win a single match. Me, Shawn, Logan and Stanley. We were battling very vigorously and planning attacking and defending strategies. About 2 plus in the noon, the sun was fucking hot and we were all dam moody, but dinner was good although my head felt like bursting, we had a little chitty chat and home sweet home. I knocked out when my head hit the bed.. So so the tired.. HAHAHA

It was fun!

2008-01-22T09:32:00.000+08:00

Hey homies.. the rocker is back!!! haha.. i'll bleed my heart for my homies.. well school is as boring as ever, been closer to more people which is good, sad.. sad.. case.. fough with my good fen.. but now its fine again.. and poeple.. i updated my blog.. so Shut UP !!!! Rocking Off!!!

2007-10-23T19:28:00.000+08:00

I am here in macs.. wow it was wonderful.. met miss lebam and hidaya.. cool siol.. nvr seen her for ages.. and we had a small talk.. chill out and ya.. school really suck.. it was so boring and most of my classmates CAO!! i was one of the goodies.. haha.. well miss my bros Cunnalingus and MR shawny horny... haha see you guys soon...

2007-10-15T09:37:00.000+08:00

OMG.. i'm so sorry Lebams... haha.. din wanna pang seh you.. ugh ugh siol.. jus Got fucking curfew, will treat you next time k? haha and also the god of gamblers.. ME .. SHAWNZIE PANTS.. LOGANISM.. it was so cool lor.. win ppl money.. haha

omg and the stakes when up to 120 BUCKS.. SUCK IT BITCH!!! haha ok .. i think it is gonna be an every week kinda thing.. haha.. I love my Fwens !!! And i'm NOT Gay You Fags!!!

Cafe Galilee in Civic Centre

2007-10-10T02:39:00.000+08:00

And so thanks to this pretty girl who helped me out with my layout. Yeah. Keeping it simple & neat. Adding a song next time if I have the time. Right now, Im with this girl in Civic Centre, Cafe Galilee. She's doing her Math. And yes you can do it!!! You can get into NYP. You & Shawn can do it. (= Oh well, shall update more soon. Skipped school today. Bet all the hawt babes gonna miss me. Peace. (now do I sound gay or what? I think Im cool & yes I do. I love my peeps)

Damn fuckin BORING..

2007-08-20T09:29:00.000+08:00

Shawn is a Horny busted :) but he is me good friend.. though he looks gangsta.. he's a cool KID .. haha .. i bet if he sees this pic he'll wank all day.. well did chill out with Logan and Shawn.. we hang out under the block, smoke, drink green tea, made fun of each other.. made shawn horny.. haha eurotrip rocks !!! shawn.. I ...

WANNA KICK UR ARSE!! STOp SayIN I"M GAy !!! ASSWIPe.. HAha.. love my crowds :)

MafiA triad

2007-08-10T13:18:00.000+08:00

Omg look at my boos.. aint she sweet haha.. look at the nose protruding from the left.. its her right hand man.. SHAWN SILVER!!!!! consecutive 2 days we hung out.. it was fun.. but annoying shawn keeps busting me up my arse.. but i;m cool.. now just confused..

sat. 4th july

2007-08-08T09:36:00.000+08:00

The Bangla who make me look like a retard.. damn busted.. steal my sticks also..wad keep in logan's cap.. i vacuum ur balls till their so small they look like peanuts.. HAHA.. Fuck Raisins!!

Calling Ll FaNs

2007-07-05T12:17:00.000+08:00

Me and Shawn the Best Pals Of All times.. Just Chill Aite.. I'm Sorry for YouR LOss..

I noE You'll find a Beter girl and Ya.. Thanks For beiNg my Support.. You Fuckin fag.. With your Gangster Face.. Hahas.. Sch starts to get BorIng.. o well At least i GoT to Noe Hot GirLs Heehee :P

New StarT

2007-04-27T11:06:00.000+08:00

Haha.. Poly was Great.. made new frens on the first day and we can click Damn weLl la..

hahaha..met loads of hot chicks..

haha

and some i think i'm gonna get.

went smokin with shawn and shaun likewas damn cool la.... shawn is a good fren and i hope we will stay this way... Shaun is a damn Hardcore kid and rocker.. he really rock my class la...hahaha we r de only 2 jokers tat create fun in our class.. it just been great. Chill out..

2006-05-27T18:14:00.000+08:00

Hmmm... its been a long and depressing day for everyone.. For joan's Family ..FRiends And relative.. May She Rest In de Hands Of God.. She Said.."Dun Mourn for me.. Be Happy tat i'm going to my Father!! Wear brigt coloured clothes on my funeral..(^^)"

Joan .. ur words deeply touched my heart.. And so i dedicate this prayer to u..

< lord.. i believe u have made a place in heaven 4 Joan..and u once said<

Let her Noe tat JOan HAs A Place in ur Father's House..

I ask This THru Jesus Christ OUr LOrd.. Amen!!>>

May U rest in Peace JOan..

I'll See U When We Meet Again With Christ..

LOve.. GODfrey..

O'level's comin Very Soon..

2006-05-25T14:48:00.000+08:00

Hey Hey .. Dudes.. Hmmm.. the crave for enjoyment is superBly strong..i noe.. but we'll make it through this temtation together i noe.. haha..kinda feelin down todae.. my neighbour Joan has just passsed on..(--)

Well.. gd luck guys.. sty=ay Chill !!!

Love U GUys...

O"" LeVeLs... Comin>> Very Soon !!

2006-04-06T21:46:00.000+08:00

Wo.. wo.. Guys .. check This out.. Cool Pic Eh??? .. Well It Will be too If U Do Well 4 Ur Ozz ... Level I Mean ... Haha .. its been A very LOng long Time Since I Signed In Alr... hope U Guys Out There .. Still Stayin Cool... To All My Frens .. U rock.. =)
If u had met My Bro.. He Looks Kinda Like This .. IN My Eyes Of Course...
good Luck For Ur comin exams.. Etc.. Stayin CoolZ... Godfrey.. Signin Off!!

PROCRASTINATION KILLS !!!

2005-10-01T08:26:00.000+08:00

ExaMs Are Comin GuyS....!!!

Go For it .. You Have A LonG H0Liday ahead...

Work Hard then play Hard >> . <<

_______

* *
and I will Do my best to Help *--* do well... i PromiSe ..

Love YA !!!! ^^Lots^^ !! HeeX!!

2005-09-14T16:34:00.000+08:00

wad a Day.. Exams r coMin SooN!!!

Study Hard guys^^

__-_

Well>>

i Just wanna Leave# EverYthing n problems untill de

Exams r oVer #

Only twenty days Left.. How to StudY??

Well.. By Hook Or By CRooK..Gotta Get it Done ..

Dun Give Up My FriEnds oUT TheRe!!!

Here"s a Quote: " You Will Reap WhAt U SoW!!!"

Gd LUck Guys!!

2005-09-01T15:16:00.000+08:00

Wow.. Its BEen A LOng Time SinCe I wroTe..Anyway

Still workin on my BanD .. And Tryin to DaTE a GiRl..

Her Name IS>> samantha<<<

WeLL tHingS just Ai'nT Workin Out RiTe..

Still>>>

i got To TaKE 1 Step At A time...

Tryin To Concentrateon my Studies ..

WaNNa Prove To My (Danger Dad)::

Gotta HAve Freedom!!!

2005-08-12T20:12:00.000+08:00

Just FiNiShEd NCC in school... wad a LonG DAy in Sch.

Well, i JuSt Found Out How Stupid I look IN mY nEw HAir...

Some SoRt Of ^ChiCkEn^..i sHoulD haVe JusT KePt my MOhaWk TaiL!!!

And An incident That Reminded me of someThing**

When PeoPle R Workin... DO NOT PLay THE FOOl.. THEn BITCh Abt PPL!!!

LIKE A MOthEr Fucker!!!!

This IS Written FOR My Dearest Bro GAbe

And TO Kelly's Old Husband

*_1_*

F U !!

2005-08-12T06:57:00.000+08:00

What A dAy in school ... Time Flies Quickly thouGh ..
laSt Night ... Some One told Me .. I Was aRRoGant--
I can accept it ... But I Was Not THat aRRogant!! :(
Anyway , i will tRy my VerY best to change {For The Better}
of course ...AND----!!!??? I am Bent On PIckin Up GUitar To play for My Band!!
Well** You Peeps out There** , DuN giVe up On me ... Especially My Bro Gabe
I Swear ... Never To lET you down .... BEliEvE In me !!!!!
Here's a Quote: " If You Do nOt Fail , YOu Will Never Suceed!!!"

2005-08-03T17:41:00.000+08:00

Just aNOtheR day ... back in SChool ... Got a LittlE bIT tiREd in Class.. Took A liTTle nap..
Staring at My seCret lover FroM afaR..Well At LeAsT my "Band" thing GOt started ..
I MIGht be Performing Live on NatioNal DaY!!!GOt some kind of MUsic Project SEE.. SO cAtch ME there ... LOOkin ForWard plaYIn with LIttle Prince NIchoLas... one of My Collegue'S baby Boy... StudY HarD you Guys OUt THere ...